"Coaching from the Sidelines"
As both a coach and parent, it has taken me years of practice to learn not to
coach from the sidelines. I ask (actually I'll even beg) parents not to coach
from the sidelines. Cheering and encouragement are great. In fact, positive cheering
causes important physiological changes in youth that increases adrenaline, maintains
their focus, and helps them have more fun. But statements like "make a run
to the far post","pass the ball", "mark up", "kick
the ball hard", or "shoot" should be avoided. Although it may seem
like such statements help the team, you are actually coaching against me. Often it feels that you need to motivate your child from the sidelines to get them pumped and playing hard. Keep in mind that as your child gets older, his coaches will (should) talk less and less from the bench. In fact, I expect my assitant coaches and managers to stay quite on the sidelines at all times. It is important for your child to motivate himself at an early age. Too much instruction from the sidelines is just white noise and adds confusion.
In addition to not coaching your child during games never, ever coach your child during our practices. If you want to watch our practices that's fine, but please just be an observer. No tips during water breaks, no shouting, etc. Our practices are designed to allow the game to be the coach. Additional coaching has a negative impact on the environment I'm trying to create. My voice and the voice of the other players should be the only one heard.
I don't want to be put in a position where I need to tell one of my players, "don't listen to your parents." For instructions on the field, there needs to be one, consistent, non-contradicting (relatively infrequently heard) voice... Mine. Players who hear different things from parents and coaches end up losing respect for one or both of the people giving them instructions. Or worse, they tire of the game and ultimately find something else to do where they don't have to listen to instructions. If you ever find yourself criticizing the methods of your coach in front of your child, please ask for your player card back.
When games or practices are over. Just say to your child, "good job, did you have fun?" Don't analyze what they did or tell them what they did wrong. Find a topic other than soccer to talk about. When your child walks off the field, the pressures of competition should disappear.
Sorry to sound like a nag, but your cooperation is important and very much appreciated!